it can be quite frustrating to want to be loved or known for certain attributes/character traits and people seeing us as a one dimensional shell. 

had a friend who was a model. most of her child and teenage life was spent absorbing the notion from everyone that she was pretty. she was a trendsetter when it came to fashion; always wearing something that seemed over the top but managing to gracefully pull it off. also, one of the most intuitive and intelligent people I knew as a teenager…and theater? her acting was just as over the top as her clothing choices but it was always entertaining. she was one of those types of people you just enjoyed looking at and being in their presence. she was definitely a bright ass star.

throughout our teens, if you asked anybody what they thought was most important to her, they usually said “her looks” because it was what she focused on and projected to others as being most important. while sending that message, education was something she focused on too. the colleges she was accepted into were evidence that she was no dummy. although, her projection of beauty was so strong that intelligence wasn’t the immediate thought when people said her name. those closest to her were well aware that she wasn’t a bird brain but living in a world that sees everything from a surface level and immediately judges, doesn’t leave room for fair assessments of some people’s character.

one day when we were in our 20’s she said in a tone that indicated some sadness, “I want a guy to like me for being smart. I don’t want them to see some pretty girl and think that’s all I have to offer. I am smart too, you know”. as her honest friend, I let her know that what we project the most is what people will identify us with, not necessarily what we want them to. 

years later, I started to see her put more emphasis on things she really loved and wanted to be known for. today, she is still a beautiful woman but that isn’t the focal point of who she is when someone mentions her name. she began making it obvious there was far more to her than a pretty face. every time I see her in media, she appears to be happier and it makes me happy for her. we haven’t talked in years but I’m confident she doesn’t feel the same as that 20-something woman who wanted to be known for being just as smart as she was attractive. she stopped just wanting it and actually made it happen.

I say all that to say, wanting something isn’t enough. if it’s important to us to be viewed in a certain light or to become something/someone of importance, we’re the only one who can make that come to fruition. the responsibility isn’t on everyone else to see us how we want them to; if we’re actually being the person we want others to know us as, THEY’LL SEE IT.

the13thfl:

image

There has been a bit of an uproar that MARVEL is replacing the White Captain America (Steve Rogers) with Sam Wilson (The Falcon), a Black man.

A BLACK MAN AS CAPTAIN AMERICA? OH MY GOD! MARVEL! WHY? THIS IS SACRILEGE AND UNHEARD OF!

Sacrilege that a Black man could be the universal patriot…

War of the Roses: Reminder

  • Her: Live in your bed of lies all you want.
  • Him: It's better here than with you. So thanks. I will.

Hello Cupid - Season 2: Episode 3 “Cassius”

Welp.

prmartyls:

By far the stupidest criticism of the new Thor is ‘no where in Norse mythology is Thor a woman, stop messing with mythology.’

Right, because Norse mythology is just fucking filled with stories about Thor hanging out with Iron Man and Captain America at the Avengers Tower.

people on the internet are funny.

(via gameswilltravel)

durnesque-esque:

observingkatherine:

giraffepoliceforce:

Still pretty proud of my response to this.

I was totally down with the change over already, but not knowing the backstory, this just convinced me so hard that Captain America needs to be a minority right now. 

Before, Marvel said, “This is what you want? Well fuck you, he isn’t going to help you.” 

Now Marvel is saying, “This is who you’re throwing under the bus? Who you’re tossing into prison like he doesn’t mean anything? Who you demonize regularly? Well fuck you, he’s going to save you anyway.”

And as far as the Thor thing, that whole, “If he be worthy part,” yeah, they’re giving the finger to the patriarchy right there saying, “Hey, women are worthy too.”

If these two things were spaced out, I might believe that they were just marketing ploy, but they come so close together at a time where this message is necessary, I can’t help but think that there are people at Marvel who get it and are going with it. 

I mean, if they were willing to fight Hitler during WWII, why not be willing to fight some of the evils of today? 

Throughout the history of Marvel comics, they’ve always created characters that sent big Fuck You’s out to people who are highly resistant to change. It was never that subtle of a message to regular readers/fans. Since it’s 2014, there really isn’t a need to be anything less than overt with intentions. I’ll support anything that encourages positive movement and change. They’re doing a great job.

(via gameswilltravel)

thamanagement:

zankiefreak88:

PREACH IT KEKE

Oh she is a force. I hope more kids are tuning in.

accepting that everyone isn’t going to like you is a simple truth that is very difficult for a lot of people to grasp…and it gets harder for people to believe it the older they get. all we can do is remind them (like KeKe) and wish them insight because it’s definitely something that has to be processed, individually.

“Those who fear me…fear my strength, my independence…they are the ones who judge me in order to shield their own weakness. I am not cold and aloof, nor am I a hater of men…I am a woman of deep loyalty…far beyond that which most…could ever hope to understand…and never again will I allow another to use my passion, or hold it against me…and thus the wheels of fate bring me full circle. My destiny is far more than what was; the future is mine to claim on my own terms.”
— Valkyrie

The Black Experience

Being a Black person is, in a word, complicated. 

We’re told every last one of us originated from Africa, yet some of us have more “other” blood in us than we’d ever care to admit…while still looking every bit of Black that we’re assumed to be.

We fight one another over how to identify with who we are. Some of my own people don’t want any other blood in our veins acknowledged because “it shouldn’t be there in the first place”. So if you happen to have a non-Black parent, doesn’t matter to them and they’ll make sure you know they view it as insignificant. As if you could exist without your White, Asian, Hispanic/Latino parent, grandparent, great grandparent, and so on. Research the “one drop rule”. WE didn’t create that rule, it was established by the government (which was (still is) run by White men). It was created to easily define people by how they looked, not by who/what they actually were. A tool used to further promote segregation, not encourage unity.

Then those of us who don’t call ourselves African American because we were not born in Africa and then moved to America. Oh, the sneers we get for calling ourselves Black Americans. Can you tell me how far back your family tree goes where you can identify the family members who lived in Africa and/or were enslaved/traveled to the Americas? Some of us can’t. Believe it or not, some of us have been told since we were children “when you look in the mirror, you see a Black person. when you go outside, everyone else sees a Black person. what more do you need to know, to understand that you’re a Black person”. Beyond this level of generally accepted ignorance, there are those of us who make attempts. The family members who could help document history are either dead, on their way, or nowhere to be found. The next step is a costly process that requires timely research. While that’s good and all, a lot of Black people aren’t going to choose to do that when they’re scraping pennies just to get by.

Next there’s the African Diaspora. Some people would you lead you to believe it only includes Black people. It doesn’t. It’s about communities of PEOPLE who came from Africa and ended up all over the world. When it’s mentioned, yes, it is often associated with all of the [Black] Africans who were enslaved and forced to leave, to live in the Americas. Are we so far down into a rabbit hole that we can’t acknowledge that all of those Africans didn’t look the same? 

Then this word “nigga”. I use it and I’m Black. Depending on where you grew up, it wasn’t considered racially offensive to hear non-Black people use it. However, if it was EVER used out of anger towards another person, whether you were Black, White, Asian, Hispanic/Latino. it becomes a vile word that provokes most to anger. Other places, you better not use it if you aren’t Black…and if you come from an old school culture that experienced levels of racism, prejudice, and discrimination we’re fortunate to not have to overtly experience, it’s a disgusting word NONE of us should want to repeat. 

But this word, it becomes clear why the idea of non-Black people using it will always cause anger and cringing. When a Black person brings up any violence, revolt, or uncomfortable thing associated with the word, does everyone who uses the word want to discuss those things? Nope. But they want to retain their right to call whoever they want, a nigga. It has become so much a part of vocabulary that for some of us, it really is no different than saying, homie, bitch, folk, asshole, or any other word we endearingly turn into a positive when a negative vibe isn’t the intended effect.

This is just the tip of the iceberg that Black people have to be conscious of every waking moment…and this is just dealing with other people who identify as having African ancestry. It becomes difficult to express our need to just be a human being. That’s how important everything has become…that humanity is the last thing we actually focus on when it should be the first, right?

Why is it so exhausting to just…be?

the13thfl:

Moko - Your Love
#13thFl #13thPerformingArt

#NP #13thFl #13thPerformingArt

the13thfl:

G.R.L. - Ugly Heart …originally slated to be the new Pussycat Dolls but ended up becoming their own group. Reminds us of the Spice Girls with a more soulful sound.

"okay you’re pretty, your face is a work of art 
your smile could light up New York City after dark
okay you’re coverboy pretty, stamped with a beauty mark
but it’s such a pity a boy so pretty, with an ugly heart”

#NP #OntheRun #13thFl #13thPerformingArt

#NP #OntheRun #13thFl #13thPerformingArt